Silly 911 calls

When people find out what I do for a living the first thing they usually say is "I bet you take some funny calls". The answer of course is yes we do. I can"t tell you everything. There are confidentiality issues, but all of the following are things we hear again and again. In fact one of the most surreal aspects of our job is the way it can suddenly shift from life threatening to absurd. Imagine the shift from life threateng to:     
    "I want to make a police report. The dry cleaners didnt clean my suit right."   
    "I'm 18 and I dont have a drivers license. Last night  I was pulled over driving a rental car. What consequences may  I face when I go to court? "    
    (citizen reporting accident) "The white car caused it." "Did you see it happen?" "No but thats how I heard it."   

   Some things I am tired of hearing:   
   "Can you give me the number for (fill in non law enforcement office)?     
   "That was just  my baby playing on the phone."   
   "This isnt an emergency, but I'm out out of minutes on my phone."   
    "Sorry, I must have pocket dialed (or butt dialed)"

     (I hate cell phones by the way,by the way, does it show? )
   
   "The 6 car accident here on the freeway has traffic really backed up" (and lacking helicopters the cruiser and tow truck are trying to get thru the same darn traffic)
      Lately i have realized that I spend way too much time talking to the insides of people pockets, and to preliterate babies whose parents think a blackberry is a chew toy. But as we like to say, its job security.